Get Your Posse

As I close out this series on stages and seasons, one thing has become especially clear to me:

Some parts of life are windows. They open for a time, and then they close. We only get one childhood, one particular age, one season of raising little ones, one version of a chapter. And when they are gone, they are gone. Forever.

Other parts of life return again and again.

Throughout our lives, we experience new beginnings, long stretches of steady faithfulness, times of fruitfulness, seasons of loss, and winters when much of what God is doing remains hidden. The circumstances change, but many of the patterns repeat.

The thread running through this entire series has been the importance of being aware of these seasons and patterns so you can be appropriate in the moment.

Appropriate in the moment is the phrase I use for recognizing what this particular stage or season requires—and responding accordingly.

John C. Maxwell calls this the Law of Timing. He says:

⏳ The wrong action at the wrong time leads to disaster.
⏳ The right action at the wrong time brings resistance.
⏳ The wrong action at the right time is a mistake.
⏳ The right action at the right time results in success.

As John puts it, when to act is as important as what to do and where to go.

It is not enough to know what is good. We need wisdom to recognize what is appropriate now.

But as I finish this series, there is one more lesson I do not want to leave out. And if you’ve followed my posts for any amount of time, it probably won’t come as a surprise:

🤠 Get your posse.

We need people beside us through every season—people who cheer us on, celebrate the harvest, offer a shoulder when we are hurting, and remain close when the road becomes difficult—and people we can encourage, strengthen, and help in return.

And sometimes, what we especially need is someone who has already traveled farther down that road.

After I went through what I call my perfect storm, I had a conversation with my former pastor, Rick. He is in that oak-tree, mature stage of life—deeply rooted, steady, and a very humble mentor.

As I told him where I had been and what I was experiencing, he began walking me through the stages of Christian maturity.

My jaw dropped.

It was as though he were reading my mail. He described my life almost to a T.

That was when something clicked for me:

This was a pattern.

While our journeys are deeply personal, they are not entirely unique. We may have different stories, personalities, and circumstances, but we often travel through similar stages, face similar questions, and experience similar patterns of grief, disappointment, confusion, growth, and renewal.

Yet when we are in the middle of something difficult, it can feel as though no one else could possibly understand. Isolation tells us that something must be uniquely wrong with us—that we are the only ones struggling, questioning, grieving, or trying to find our footing.

Then we sit down with someone who has walked a similar road and the light switch comes on.

Pastor Rick helped me see:

You are not alone. This is part of the journey. Keep going.

I remember wishing I had spoken with him sooner.

His wisdom would not have removed the difficulty, but it could have removed so much of the confusion. He could have helped me recognize the terrain, avoid a few landmines, and understand that some of what I was experiencing was normal—not evidence that I had completely lost my way.

That is one of the greatest gifts a mentor can give us.

They cannot walk the road for us, but they can help us understand where we are. They can remind us of what is true when we cannot yet see clearly. And they can help us respond in a way that is appropriate for the moment.

But eventually, this comes full circle.

At some point, we are invited to turn around and offer that same gift to someone coming behind us.

Scripture says that God comforts us in our troubles so that we can comfort others with the comfort we ourselves have received from Him. (2 Corinthians 1:3–4)

Nothing surrendered to God is wasted—not even the difficult seasons.

🧭 Your experience may become someone else’s reassurance.
🌱 Your healing may become someone else’s hope.
🕯️ Your hard-earned wisdom may help someone else navigate the road with less fear and confusion.

So as you move through the stages and seasons of life:

Find someone ahead of you.
Walk with people beside you.
And turn around for someone behind you.

🤠Get your posse—and become part of someone else’s. 🌿

For those who want to go deeper… 🌳🧭

I created a full-length guide called Match the Guide to the Terrain. This is not a quick read—it is closer to a short book—but it explores this idea in much greater depth.

Inside, we unpack:

the difference between knowledge and seasoned wisdom
why some seasons require someone who has actually walked the road
what may be happening when the old spiritual equations stop working
how God moves us from confidence in outcomes to deeper trust in Him
who to go to for what—therapists, pastors, theologians, seasoned believers, physicians, friends, and other specialists
what to look for in a trustworthy guide
common mistakes we make when seeking counsel
reflection questions and an extensive Scripture study list

For anyone navigating a long, confusing, age-specific, or spiritually complex season—or helping someone who is—this guide is designed to help you recognize the terrain and find the right kind of wisdom for the road.

Read Match the Guide to the Terrain here: