🦸‍♂️ The Superman Pose

When Scott and I were first married, he worked at a couple of different hospitals, including a smaller hospital about 45 minutes from where we lived. We didn’t really know anyone in that community yet—at least, I didn’t—and one of the physician leaders there invited all the doctors and their spouses over for dinner.

They had pushed tables together so everyone was sitting around one long table.

At some point, a couple of people got into a discussion that started out fine but gradually became a little contentious.

And because it was the only conversation happening, the whole table basically got pulled into the tension.

I was so absorbed in what was happening that I didn’t even notice our host get up.

Then, out of nowhere, I heard:

“Hey guys… guess who am I?” 

I looked over, and he was posing through the doorway like Superman in flight—with the wall hiding the rest of his body so all I could see were his arms stretched out in the Superman pose. 🦸‍♂️

😂

The entire room broke.

The conversation shifted.

The temperature dropped.

And I remember thinking, 

T h a t 

W a s 

B r i l l i a n t   🔥

He exercised social leadership without announcing that he was leading.

I’ve thought about that moment many times since.

Sometimes the wisest move in a tense moment is not to try to solve the issue at the temperature at which it first appears.

➜ You interrupt the momentum.

➜ You shift the energy.

➜ You loosen the tension before it takes over.

I’ve started thinking of this as the Superman Pose.

It doesn’t mean avoiding hard conversations. Some things absolutely need to be addressed.

And it’s not the move to use when someone is genuinely hurting and needs to feel heard. Humor can become dismissive when tenderness is what the moment requires.

But when a conversation is becoming increasingly contentious and the temperature is climbing?

Sometimes the most emotionally intelligent thing you can do is not referee the disagreement.

Just lower the temperature.

A little humor.
A well-timed question.
A playful interruption.
A change of direction.

Not every tense moment needs a speech.

Sometimes it just needs Superman. 😉